What Rhymes with Trampoline?

Yes, you guessed it, Imogen does! (Contrary to the belief of a certain substitute teacher at the school on Orcas where Tess was working this week, who claims that "hide" and "lied" don't actually rhyme because words can't rhyme if they are spelled differently. Who gave this guy a teaching certificate?)

So, I offer you a limerick in honor of Imogen's first real trampoline experience.

There once was a baby named Imogen
who wanted to bounce on the trampoline.
She gave it a try
with her Papa nearby
and her singing brother accompanying.

Ok, so I took some liberty with that last line, but that's what we call poetic license (look it up, crazy substitute teacher!). I was actually trying to end with the word "submarine" but just couldn't work it in. Too bad Elliot wasn't singing The Beatles! And now the visual component:




Pretty stinkin' cute, huh? And as if that weren't enough to satisfy your cute quota for the day, here is Imogen modeling her wild child locks.



Have a great weekend, everyone!

Past Lives

As of this August, I will have lived in Portland exactly half of my life - 18 years. The 2 years I lived in Minnesota I was too young to remember, and the 16 years I spent in Colorado seem a lifetime ago. But I have always been good at keeping in touch. I still keep up with my middle school social studies teacher and my high school English and dance teachers. I still know where all but 2 of my close high school friends are (Lori and Asha, where are you?). Oh the places we'll go? Here's where we went:

* Lisa is a naturopathic doctor living in Australia with her husband and 2 kids.
* Lydia is a nurse living in Wheat Ridge, Colorado, where she's finally settled down and bought a house with her partner and dog.
* Jim has been fighting the good fight as a teacher and now an administrator for my old school district, Cherry Creek, in Aurora, Colorado.
* Matt is making wonderful music in Asheville, North Carolina.
* Angi is a doctor living in Durham, North Carolina with her husband and son.
* Kirstin is also a doctor living in Denver, Colorado.
* Marcelle lives in Westminster, Colorado with her husband and dogs, though I'm not sure what wonderful worldly things she's doing with her talents these days (time to catch up!).
* Andy is a fashion designer in New York City.
* Laurel is a supermom in Erie, Colorado.

Here is me with Lisa, Jim, Matt, and Lydia around Christmas 2000 (I think). It was the first time we were all in the same place since high school, and it hasn't happened since (maybe at the 20 year reunion in 2010?).


Also seeming light years ago is my life before Thomas, and even more so my life before children. We knew that having children would mean we would probably see less of our friends without kids, and that has definitely been the case. We've built an amazing family of friends here in Portland, from the days of the Schiller House and Monday night dinners (back in 1992), to our post-Reed days on 32nd Avenue (1997) and 10th Avenue (2000), to our friends-with-lots-of-parents days now here on 57th Avenue. We have an enormous circle of friends after 18 years here, and we do think of all of you often, even if we don't see you as much as we used to or we'd like to.

Somehow, even having several good friends who are stay-at-home mothers, most of my adult interaction these days is limited to a few minutes talking to Elliot's teachers or other parents at drop-off and pick-up times and conversations with the cashiers at the grocery store who coo at Imogen. Even Thomas and I have a hard time trying to have a real conversation when one of the kids isn't requiring our attention (thank goodness for that date to see the new Narnia movie - it was great! The movie and the date, of course.).

So I'm glad it's almost summer. It seems like we all hole up for the winter here in Portland, and summer brings us back together to hang out while the kids play in the yard. Elliot is happiest outdoors, and we spend pretty much every afternoon of summer in the backyard with the trampoline, chickens, and wading pool. So here is my open invitation to my community - come hang out with us anytime! Though it can sometimes be hard to pull ourselves out of our busy, self-and-family-oriented lives, I know we could use the company! I must always remind myself that it does take a village, and the reason we've been in Portland for so many years is because we value the community we've found here. Time to make good on those promises to keep in touch!

Inch By Inch, Row By Row

Despite the rain, we have been busy with the yard and garden. We finally got all of our seeds in this weekend. We're a little late, but hopefully everything will come up and we'll have a bountiful garden. It's going to be a crowded one, so I'm sure we'll be doing some thinning. You can see we got a little carried away.


So far the beets and carrots have started to come up (they got a head start a couple of weeks ago), and here is Elliot's bean plant that he grew in preschool.


All of my Mother's Day herbs are doing fabulously, as well.


It has been very fun this spring to see what blooms in our yard, since we moved in last summer. The woman who owned the house for 17 years before us was a definite green thumb, and she planted all sorts of beautiful things. I love that my favorite flowers, calla lilies, are growing in the front yard, shown here with our huge and prehistoric-looking euphorbia bush.


And they don't call Portland the City of Roses for nuthin. This rose bush grows beside our back deck and is completely gorgeous, as well as smelling like roses are supposed to smell - delicious enough to make you close your eyes and swoon.


After the drizzle let up yesterday and Elliot was starting to feel better, we hung out in yard for a bit. Here is Elliot engaged in his favorite outdoor activity - finding worms for the chickens and duck.


Pippin and Joey checked out the trampoline, littered with droppings from the apple and cherry trees (you should have seen Thomas bounce them off before they could leave their own droppings!).


Thomas spent the afternoon working on some art pieces for SOAK, the Portland regional Burning Man event that takes place at the end of June. Here he is posing with his sculptures with our friend Skye, who came to help out.


Imogen got a little love from Skye, as well.


After our wet outdoor afternoon, the kids did some actual playing TOGETHER in the play room. Elliot was a good big brother and "took care" of Imogen for Mama for about 10 minutes while I put away the laundry and spied on them every three seconds. They were having a blast, Elliot shared, and no one got knocked over.


Happy Memorial Day to everyone! Elliot is feeling better today, and so Thomas and I are going to leave BOTH children with Nancy, Vic, and Uncle Mike and go to the new Narnia movie. Hooray for a date!

This One Goes to Eleven

Happy anniversary to us! Today is the 11th anniversary of Thomas and my wedding. Particularly cool is that it falls on the exact day as the year we were married - the Sunday of Memorial Day weekend. The weather is also similar - overcast and gray - although today there is a steady drizzle which we were spared on our actual wedding day.

We were married at McMenamin's Edgefield, which used to be the county poor farm. It's a gorgeous historic location with several old buildings and beautiful grounds. We had the ceremony in the Power Station Theater and the reception in the Power Station Attic. We had fabulous Irish music by Randal Bays and the Rashers, the food was yummy, and the company was fantastic. Here we are in the lovely gardens.


As part of our ceremony, we made this wish:

We want to recognize today that this ceremony, this day of transformation and joy, is something that is being denied to same-sex couples. To our gay and lesbian friends gathered here, as you witness today this knitting of two hearts and lives, may you also receive our wish and urgent hope that when you find your soulmates, you also will be able, if you wish, to choose this path in legality, acceptance, and celebration.

So we are thrilled that this anniversary brings the decision by the California Supreme Court to give same-sex couples the constitutional right to marry. And what sets California's law apart from the law in Massachusetts is that California allows couples from other states to get married in their state, as well. We're hoping that the California decision will set off a trend across the country so that all same-sex couples will be allowed to marry legally someday.

Today we had planned to celebrate by actually leaving both children with the grandparents and going to see the new Narnia movie, but unfortunately Elliot is feeling under the weather, so we're all laying low instead. So today at 3:30pm, instead of being lost in the world of Aslan and the Pevensie children, we'll reflect on our vows (inspired by Rilke):

Thomas and Brittney, do you both promise to be the guardians of each other's solitude, to love one another with what in each of you in unfinished, with what in each of you is still changing? Do you promise to love, respect, and ennoble one another? To continue to grow, teach, and learn from one another? To support each other with compassion, humor, and grace? Do you vow to honor each other's differences, so that your two spirits compliment one another, and so you share with one another your deepest and most unique thoughts, hopes, and fears? Do you promise to take care of each other, and to approach one another always with complete honesty, with palms upturned? And do you both promise to make of this life together a home, and to hold one another always as soulmates and closest friends?

We do.

The World According to Elliot

It seems another lifetime ago that Elliot was almost completely non-verbal at 2 years old. For those of you who spend time with him regularly now, you know that he talks non-stop. He talks about elevators. He talks about Imogen. He talks about the girls he played with at tumbling class and how he made them laugh running under the parachute. He talks about the kids at school. He plays "Teacher Jessica's class" and talks himself through the entire preschool routine. He talks to himself when he's falling asleep at night and as soon as he wakes up in the morning (we can hear him reciting the numbers on the digital clock until 6:45am, when he knows he can get out of bed). He talks, and talks, and talks. And talks. Loudly.


Much of what Elliot says is ecolalic - he's repeating something he's heard, or he's saying the same thing he always says, exactly the same, over and over again. But more and more these days, he offers comments on the world or tells me, in his own circuitous way, about what he did at school, or with Papa, or some other time we weren't together. And once in awhile he comes up with a fabulous word-play joke. For example:

1. You might not realize that when counting in Spanish, the number 2 is actually pronounced, "ghost". Number 9 is accompanied by a friendly wave and is pronounced (make sure to affect a Canadian accent) "new wave, ay?".

2. The common name of the dinosaur Brachiosaurus is actually "broccolisaurus".

3. Tartar sauce is more correctly referred to as "pirate sauce".


In other news, Imogen has teeth! Her bottom two teeth have finally broken ground, though they are not quite tall enough yet for a photo op. Here she is giving those new sharpies a workout.


And I must leave you a picture of Elliot and Imogen having happy sibling time together (those bars are for her own protection, believe me!).


And here's a silly video of Imogen getting fabulously excited about her reflection in the kitchen cabinet knobs.



And I can't sign off without saying congratulations, David Cook! This is the first time my favorite has ever won American Idol. Woo hoo!!

Now if my favorite can just win the election in November with the same turnout of millions of voters.... go Obama!!

Fun in the Sun

Today is the last day of Nana and Atman's visit - boo hoo!! They leave tomorrow morning to head up to Orcas Island to visit Tess and her family. We've had a wonderful time hanging out with them this past week.

On one of our hot afternoons, we took the kids to a mostly shaded park to play. Here are Elliot and Atman taking turns on the slide (silly Atman!).

And, while the playground was shaded, Elliot of course wanted to check out the very-much-in-the-sun baseball diamond. Atman obliged by running the bases with him.

We also spent plenty of time hanging out in the backyard. We brought Imogen's playpen out under the apple tree so she could watch the goings-on without being trampled by her (loving) brother.

Imogen also loved discovering grass for the first time and practicing her almost-crawling skills with Papa.

And of course there has been much jumping on the trampoline.

In the midst of all this excitement, Joey the duck finally decided that she's a duck and not a chicken. She now loves paddling about in the wading pool and giving herself baths.

The hot weather has also been an excellent chance for Imogen to break in her lovely collection of sun dresses. First up, here she is playing with what I'm calling the "girlypus" - a sparkly purple octopus with frilly pink legs that Nana and Atman gave to her.

And here she is in the adorable sun dress that I really wish came in my size.

The entire day she was wearing it, I kept thinking she reminded me of something. I finally figured out that the dress reminds me of a book that I used to read at my grandmother Gm's house as a girl - The Lonely Doll by Dare Wright. The books were published in the 1960s, and apparently some of them are still in print. They tell stories of the doll and Mr. Bear using photographs of dolls and teddy bears. Here is a picture of Edith, the Lonely Doll herself.

Imogen is cuter, of course, but you can see the resemblance!

This past weekend we also were lucky enough to meet Vic's stepdaughter, Nova. Though we only got to spend a few minutes with her, we could tell she is an amazing woman. She is also a gifted photographer, and she blew me away by letting us choose a print of hers from her portfolio of work from her travels around Asia with her (also photographer) husband these past four years. I picked a gorgeous photo of a woman in Pakistan wearing clothes of elaborate bead work and embroidery, photographed from the back carrying twin babies who are peeking over her shoulders. It's breathtakingly beautiful. You can view some of Nova's work here.

This afternoon is rainy and cool, and Nana and Atman are playing with Elliot upstairs while I write this blog and Imogen naps. We're all going to miss having them around! Tonight we're celebrating with pizza and the battle of the Davids on American Idol. Go David Cook! We're rooting for a rocker to finally win!!

Duck, Duck, Goose

We're having a great time with Nana and Atman in town, despite the fact that we're having a record-breaking heat wave. It's about 95 degrees today, and we're planning to spend the afternoon staying put in the shade of the apple tree in the backyard with the wading pool. First up today, here is Imogen coveting Nana's necklace.


Yesterday we had a grand adventure at the Crystal Springs Rhododendron Gardens, which are just across the street from Thomas's and my alma mater, Reed College. The gardens are a bird watcher's paradise, though there are not as many species of ducks there in the summer as there are in winter. There were plenty of mallards, though!


We were joined by Denny and Phyllis, and we spent about an hour and a half strolling the gardens.


May is the peak of the rhododendron season, and most of the plants were in full bloom.


Even though the gardens had run out of duck food for the day, Elliot still had a great time looking at all of the ducks and geese. He also especially loved the many bridges, and the tree trunk that he pretended was a nest.


There were ducklings and goslings everywhere, which were a big hit with both kids.



My personal favorite are wood ducks, and we were lucky enough to spot a few pairs.


The gardens were a wonderful place to spend a hot afternoon, roaming in the shade with a nice breeze off the water. Imogen thoroughly enjoyed her first rhododendron adventure, as well as all the attention from her relatives.


And finally, here is Elliot entertaining Imogen with a favorite song we made up, "Baby Got Cute".



Now back to the naked boy splashing in the wading pool just outside my office doors...

Two-Thirds Years Old

Imogen turned 8 months old yesterday. Woo hoo!! She is now sitting up like a champ, pulling herself up and scooting slowly sideways, and spinning herself in circles while on her tummy. She's pushed up to her knees a couple of times, but she gets frustrated very quickly when she's on her tummy, so we'll see how long it takes her to learn to crawl! Still no teeth yet, but we can see the first little white nub just poking through. Here are the 8-month comparison photos of Elliot and Imogen.



This week I attended a presentation through our parents' support organization by two young women with disabilities about what they wished their parents had known when they were kids. The first woman was 28 years old and has Down's Syndrome, and the second woman was a 31-year old with Asperger's who is also deaf and has a 3-year old with autism. Elesia Ashkenazy is a truly incredible, articulate, and kind individual, and I learned a great deal from listening to her explain what was going on in her head as a child on the autism spectrum. I took several nuggets of information away from the evening that I know will be of immense help to us right now in being the best parents we can be for Elliot.

Elesia spoke about how important to her it was to be able to indulge her "special interests" as a child (ok, we'll have to stop trying to get Elliot to play something other than the "elevator game"), and how it helped to keep her happy and calm. She also said that when her parents were calm and centered, that she felt safe and was compliant, even when she disagreed with them (Elliot's mama needs to work on that one!). Elesia wasn't diagnosed until she was older, and she said that if she had had the help of visual schedules as a child, it would have made all the difference in the world. Elliot's MECP teacher, Jessica, is going to help me make some of these for him for our more difficult routines at home (he loves the one he uses in class). Finally, she said that one of the best things parents of children on the spectrum can do is to read as many books as they can by adults with autism. Great advice that I will be taking!

Nana and Atman arrived for a week-long visit yesterday, so stay tuned for pictures of our adventures this week! This afternoon we are going to brave the unusual 85-degree weather and head to the Crystal Springs Rhododendron Gardens to see the gorgeous flowers and feed the ducks. And speaking of ducks, Joey is doing great, although we're still not convinced 100% that she's a Buff Orpington duck. I think we're going to have to bring a picture of her to the feed store for a positive ID. Pippin, on the other hand, is definitely a Light Brahma bantam. And female. Hooray!

Happy Mother's Day

Today is my sixth Mother's Day as a mama myself (that counts being pregnant with Elliot in May, 2003). My mother has had 38 Mother's Days as a mom. My grandmother has had 63. Someday Imogen may become a mother herself.

Happy Mother's Day to all of the mothers I know: Mom, Gm, Pam, Nancy K., Tess, Kate, Angel, Meghann, Robin, Sandy, Christine D., Phyllis, Pauline, Gwynne, Peggy, Suzie, Penny, Pat G., Lisa P., Jill, Cheryl, Andrea S., Ellen, Mary Ann, Christine J., Sarah H., Chrissy, Chris, Sally, Kerry C., Kerry B., Gina, Alenna, Anya, Chau, Lisa B., Lisa H., Heather, Laurel, Heidi, Sarah B., Rebecca, Rachael, Froukje, Kathy, Melody, Christine H., Anndee, Elissa, Suzanne, Joanna, Kristen, Deborah, Christie, Juniper, Nicolle, Marsha, Julie M., Jade, Janet, Melinda, Kamila, Geraldine, Hermine, Sarah M., Tami, Naomi, Laura, Sarah N., Zoh, Angi, Angie, Erin, Tina, Preetha, Shelly, Jennifer, Wendy, Pat W., Alissa, Katie, Lesley, Andrea P., Donna A., Katrina, Lori, Aye, Donna B., Sara, Julie S., Cicely, Tricia, Hannelore, Jody, Kim, Mary B., Nagi, Tracy, Carol, Virginia, Marion, Anne, Twylah, and Mary M. (Whew! Y'all are in no particular order, and my goodness, if I left anyone out, please holler!)

Here's a special blessing to a few amazing women who will make wonderful mothers someday: Connie, Kevia, Keiko, Lisa, Marcelle, Lexi, and Melissa. And finally, in remembrance of our grandmothers who have passed on: Gran, Nonnie, and Grandma McElroy.

I started today thinking about an incredible story I heard on NPR a couple of years ago about how women carry the fetal cells of their babies (born, miscarried, and aborted, all) in their bodies for their entire lives. There is mounting evidence that these fetal cells can act like embryonic stem cells, clustering around injury or illness in the mother's body and becoming the cells that are necessary to heal. Pretty amazing. You can listen to the entire story here.

This morning we packed up the kiddos and headed to Blue Heron Herbary on Sauvie Island, a farming community nestled in the Columbia River on the outskirts of town (also the home of the pumpkin patch we visit each Halloween). We have been buying herbs from them for years.


I left most of my plants behind when we moved, so I went wild buying all sorts of starts for the new house. I bought mostly culinary herbs, and replaced my much-beloved echinacea plant that didn't survive the move (it was the one plant I tried to bring with, because I had it for so many years). Here's my bounty, which will be moving to containers on the back porch this afternoon.


The herbary is also home to doves, a rabbit, dogs, and now chickens. The owner, Mike, knows us well by now, and he was nice enough to let Elliot and Thomas head back to the hen house to meet his daughter's new flock.



Also cool is that the old Sauvie Island bridge is being replaced with a new one. Here are the two bridges, side by side.


Now we're back at the homestead for the afternoon, and I'd better get back out there to the garden and my new herbs! Happy Mother's Day!!

Tell Me A Story

Today is my sweet sixteen. And not the one when I got my driver's license. Today is the sixteenth anniversary of my first date with Thomas.

Thomas and I met through a mutual friend at Reed College. It was the spring of my sophomore year, and Thomas was taking classes at the community college and applying to go to Reed, as well as working as a caregiver for an AIDS hospice. Thomas and I had met on a couple of different occasions that spring, and while dancing in the Reed Commons during Renn Fayre weekend, he asked for my phone number. Neither of us had pen or paper, and so, in a completely untypical gesture for me, I took my finger and outlined my number on his chest. And he remembered it. He called me the next day and asked me out.

I didn't date in high school, and I had only had one boyfriend while at Reed, so dating was a new and somewhat intimidating thing for me. Thomas came to pick me up in his ancient Volvo station wagon, wearing his Mickey Mouse suspenders. He was altogether charming (that hasn't changed!). I'm terrible at small talk, so when we got into the car, I said, "Tell me a story." Serendipitously, he had just been told the Native American story of Jumping Mouse by a friend from his folklore class. He didn't miss a beat and began telling the story to me. I think I fell in love on the spot.

We went downtown to First Thursday, a monthly art gallery walk here in Portland. We visited the galleries and the Portland Art Museum and then headed to Escape From New York Pizza for dinner. Then we took a walk on the Hawthorne Bridge, which at the time was closed for repair, and he held my hand (sweet, huh?). We spent the rest of the evening at my house talking about everything, everything, into the wee hours (and that's all you get to hear about what happened that night!).

So, here we are 16 years later, with two kids, a grown-up house, and coming up on our 11th wedding anniversary.


I knew from day one that Thomas was the love of my life. It may get lost sometimes in the chaos and challenge of raising young children, but I daily appreciate his passion, humor, intelligence, wit, compassion, honesty, loyalty to friends and family, and dedication as a husband and father (and he's a handsome fellow, to boot).

We've never been much for anniversary presents or celebrations, but here are the two best presents Thomas has ever given me.


I don't think I remember to say thank you enough. Or I love you. So, Thomas, here's my anniversary present to you today. Thank you for being an amazing husband, father, and human being. I love you.

How Does Your Garden Grow?

After a cool, rainy week, we're again hopeful that spring is coming to Portland. We had a gorgeous Sunday of sun and 70 degree weather, and we spent the day working on our garden. Those of you who have been here know that our yard is beautifully landscaped, as the woman who lived here for 17 years before we bought the house was an avid gardener. She filled every square inch of the yard with trees, flowers, and bushes, as you can see here.


However, she never put her mark on one forgotten area of the property - the 25x5.5 foot space on the south side of the garage. We've spent the last few sunny weekend opportunities clearing that space of weeds and blackberries. Now it looks like this:


The spot gets full sun until about 4pm, and we're going to be quite ambitious and will be growing all sorts of delicious items from seeds, including several kinds of greens, onions, garlic, leeks, butternut and sweet meat squash, tomatoes, carrots, beets, pumpkins, cantaloupe, broccoli, cucumbers, beans, peas, fennel bulb, and artichokes. We're also transplanting several strawberry plants from the strip along the north driveway. Yum! Hopefully it will all fit! We got all artsy yesterday, as well, and made these stakes for our garden (lettering by yours truly and drawings by Thomas).


The kids had a blast hanging out in the yard all day. Here is Imogen being her cute, happy self.


And here is Elliot showing off the garden stakes, as well as sporting his new haircut. He and Papa went on an adventure to ride elevators and get haircuts on Saturday. Elliot sat still in the chair for the stylist for the entire time - a very big deal for him. We're proud parents!


And here are the kids and me in our sun hats taking a break from pulling weeds and looking for worms.


And remember the coyote I saw near Ikea? That was only a couple of miles away from our house, and we found out this weekend that there is a coyote and pup living in a yard around the corner from us. The yards on that part of the street are 200 feet deep and left partially wild, and the coyotes have made a den in the blackberry brambles. My guess is that they are eating the rats that are attracted to the fruit and nut trees in the area. Hopefully they'll stick to the varmints and leave the cats alone! Apparently coyotes are not so uncommon in Portland anymore, as you can read about here, and they are generally harmless to humans. As long as they don't eat our vegetables!